Paul Revere AKA Cameron Staley

Today I had the opportunity to play mom instead of employee for a small window of time this morning.  I forgot how much  enjoyed walking my kids to school and listening to the conversations they hold with one another.  It usually consists of one telling the other that they are going to fast, to turn into a foot race to see who can get there first.

Today though, I got to watch our Cameron-Man perform his best Paul Revere (in costume) for a history lesson in class today.  Having that small opportunity, and watching him grin knowing that I sacrificed some pay and time from work to see him, made all the difference in the world.

My perspective needs a little kick sometimes.  And sometimes I need to stop and smell the roses and just let things be.  So what if my house isn't spotless, it just shows that our house is lived in and love resides here.

Enjoy the pictures of our own little Paul Revere!

Wrong Side of the Bed...Maybe

Every now and again I wake up on the wrong side of the bed.  Sometimes it can last all week.  My husband says its PMS, I just say I'm not happy and can't find my happy place.  Today was one of those days, and nothing seemed to get me out of my funk.  I have a feeling it is probably going to be one of those weeks.  No amount of scripture reading, meditation, and deep breathing helped me out of it today.

On a good note, and I would like to end on a good note, I did get 6 chapters in the Book of Mormon read.  At least I know where to go for help so that I do not blow my top, but I did with a certain little man, when I saw his missing assignment sheet with his grades.  Makes mommy rethink some choices she has made in the last year.

Back I go to scripture reading and heartfelt prayers to make it through the week in one piece, and so that my kids can make it through the week in one piece also.

A Handbook Would Be Nice

Sometimes I wish that kids would come with a handbook.  One that would explain the actions of a usually very obedient and sweet little boy, who loses all aspects of right and wrong and what he has been taught.  

Recently it has come to light that our very sweet (emotional at times) young man has been the target of a bully.  For weeks we could not figure out what was going on with our little guy, until he came down stairs to have us ground him because he was not doing his homework.  Not normal for the boy who wants to have strait  A's.

Today we caught this usually obedient kiddo in a lie that will have some serious consequences.  Consequences that will make it hard for him to be trusted.  Consequences very similar to the boy crying wolf.

A handbook would make this situation easier for his parents to understand and easier to make him understand how much more difficult he has made this particular situation.

My hope is that he will step up, manage to get enough courage to do the right thing and finally put all of this behind him, so that we can get our sweet, obedient little guy back.

Sacrifices

I have made a large number of sacrifices in my life.  None have seemed to a take as large a toll on my spirit as working full time out of the home has.  It was a difficult decision to come to.  It is still difficult to leave home every morning and not be able to walk my kids to school.  I don't think it will ever not be difficult to leave.  I just have to remind myself that the sacrifices that have to be made are for blessings in the future.

I have had yet another schedule change at work that now cuts my lunch hour to a half hour.  I was already working an hour of overtime due to our therapists different schedules and now we are adding another half hour to my already long day.  The extra money really is nice when it comes to working out our debt situation, but it is difficult to spend even more time away from my family.

The one miracle that keeps me going, is knowing that anything my kids want to do, we have the means to allow that to happen.  I have the greatest husband in the world, who has taken on even more responsibility around the house to take some of the load off of me.  That is on top of his already difficult job.  The two of us really know how to work as a team.  What time we get together as a couple and as a family is time well spent and memories that will last a life time.  And that makes the sacrifices seem small in the grand scheme of things.

Perspective

It is funny how something small and insignificant can change ones perspective.  Life is never easy.  Never has been, never will be.  That much I know, but life and its events can change ones perspective.  I have always been somewhat of a pessimist.  Just my nature.  I was always quick to judge instead of seeing what I need to see first and then making the judgement.  Or hearing what I needed to hear and than making a judgement.  Life and its imperfections have made me change my perspective.  Take what I have and make it what I can, good or bad.

Instead of feeling anxious and nervous, I have a calm that I have never experienced.  I can only hope that this change of heart and spirit might continue.  I'm not perfect by any means, don't think I will be ever, but I can strive to make myself perfect enough that someone will see me in a different light and question my change, that I might be able to change their life and perspective as well.

I live for the gospel of Jesus Christ, I live for my family, and I live to spend eternity with them.  Nothing is more important than this.

New Year, New Goal...Lets stick with it

I am hoping that my time will be more allotted to write my days happenings on our blog, that I might make sure to reflect each day on the events that transpired.  That I might be able to write more often about the good, the bad, the ugly... and come out and see how I can change and grow and become the better person that I know I can be, I just have to work at it.

I am not a perfect person, mother or wife.  My time is not always spent in ways that don't make me feel guilty when I am done looking at my phone for 3 hours.  I have found that I tend to idle my time away as soon as I walk in the door from work each evening.

I am hoping with the coming year that I can be less idle, I now write my to do list the night before so that I see it on the white board every morning when I get up.  I am hoping that I can be more physically active and more attentive to myself, again less idle.  I am hoping that I can de-clutter my home, get rid of some of the acquired items that just sit and collect dust.  And maybe get my sanity back in the meantime, that I don't overwhelm myself when I look at all the work that needs to be accomplished, when I am so busy that I can't find the time to tidy up.

Some of my goals will continue past the first initial week of this year, and some will fall prey to the failed resolutions bucket.  My hope is, that if I write it down, I might hold myself more accountable to myself.

                                                  This is the reason for my goals for 2014

Patience...a virtue I really need to perfect

I have, for years now, wanted to be the mom that gets to stay at home and raise her kids, help in their classrooms, and be there in the event of an emergency.  I, of course, am not that mom.  This past week has been really difficult for me.  I have been an grumpy gus.  And that is the nicest way I could put it.  I have not been very happy at work since I had to return to work full time (going on 8 months).  It is a daily struggle for me to put that smile on my face and greet patients as they walk in the door, because I would much rather be at home cleaning my house, preparing dinner and getting the kids from school.  For over a year now, we have been doing our best to get me out of the working environment and into the home environment.  It obviously hasn't gone as planned, and what little patience I have had,
has gone out the door.  I am tired of waiting.  I want something to give.  I want to be happy doing something other than what I am doing now.

For now I need to be patient (easier said than done sometimes).  But, maybe that is the lesson I am to learn along with the rest of the family.

Maybe tomorrow will bring news of a change.

Responsibility...a hard pill to swallow

Especially for my Cameron-man.

This guy is having to learn a lesson that is even hard for us adults.  Lately we have been dealing with being forgetful...forget to do homework, forget to bring homework home, forget to do chores.  He is one great kid, but is having to learn a lesson in being responsible.  If he had a one track mind he would do great, but his mind moves at light speed sometimes.  I hope that this is just a phase and that he will get more and more responsible.  I can't take any more tearful phone calls on my way to work in the morning.  It makes being a working mommy very hard.  I wish I could fix it all for him, but I know that I would only make him more reliant on me and even less responsible.  Patience from me for now.

He will get it one day... I Hope.

Weekend Getaways are the Best Way to Recharge

After a really crumby day at work today.  I am thankful that I was able to run the kids to Monterey for a quick jaunt to the aquarium over the weekend.  There is something about the ocean that recharges my battery and helps me make it through another week of craziness.  It also builds some great memories that will last our family a lifetime.  Next time we go we will make sure that daddy can go with us.

Hindsight is always 20/20

On Tuesday, my husband met me for lunch at my workplace and we picked up some fast food and headed to his best friends home.  Mainly to see what progress had been made on their home and then to show off the wheels that my husband had powder coated on his truck.  (I am not your typical girl, that doesn't know what that means, I am more of a guys girl.  You'll learn that quickly as I do my best to get this blog running again.)

As we left, and headed back to my workplace, we talked about how nice it would be to be homeowners again and living a completely different lifestyle.  Because of circumstances beyond our control, and some in our control, I have been forced to return to the workforce full time.  It isn't ideal and my husband is actively trying to change that current state, but it is what is working for us right now.

As I pondered more what we had talked about, I came to realize that what is most important to me is my happy and healthy family.  If we had done things differently in the past we would not be where we are right now.  I don't have the house of my dreams.  I don't have the nice new car.  I'm not where I would have pictured myself at this point in my life.  But what I don't have, makes what I do have, that much more important and special to me.  I can't focus on what I don't have.  I can focus on what I do have a celebrate all that is good.

What I do have is a husband who works hard to provide all that he can for his family.  I have a son who impresses me everyday with his mind.  I wish I had half his smarts.  I have a daughter who never ceases to amaze me with how fast she can pick up a sport or activity and become the best that she can with hard work and lots of practice.

It may not be what we pictured in our minds of what our future held for us when we got married years ago, but I don't regret one choice or decision we have ever made in our lives together.  It has taken me a few years to realize this, but it brings me joy and happiness that I can be at
peace with the fact that I am where I need to be right now.

Another Attempt & Maybe (probably) Fail

I have needed to do this for months.  That's right, update my blog.  I am making yet another attempt to make this an everyday occurrence so that I have a record (journal) that my munchkins can read and learn from and understand the importance of keeping a journal themselves.

I would love to go into great detail about all that has gone on with our family, but you would get bored, I would keep rambling, and there would be page after page of events that have gone on with the Staley Family.

There was Valentines Day, and I don't even remember what happened.  There was Easter, and the kids always get their new Spring duds for Easter Sunday.  Bama played in her first year of softball and improved so much from start to finish. There was swim team, which my Bama (nickname for my daughter) did awesome.  Even surprised her mom and dad with how well she did.  Her brother, on the other hand, had to miss most of the season with a broken nose due to a soccer game at summer school.  Note to all parents out there, the pole always wins and the nose always loses.  The Cameron Man has taken up golf and has really come to fancy it a bit.  There was our wonderful trip to Yellowstone and stay in Big Sky, Montana.  I now understand why Montana is always  referred as Big Sky Country.  Of course we had an end of summer trip to Lake Tahoe as one last hurrah before the start of another school year.  The Mr. and Miss have ranked (moved) up to 5th grade and 2nd grade.   Bama started soccer thanks to our closest friends who needed another player on their team.  She has taken to that as well.  Cameron and Dad got to watch the pro's play @ Pebble Beach and Cameron Man was 100% impressed by the opportunity.  Mom and Bama spent the day @ the Monterey Bay Aquarium to pass the time.  Apparently she loves jellyfish.  I love puffins (they're birds). That about sums up our everything that has apparently happened in our lives (what I can remember at this point).

I will share some photos just so you don't have to read a boring post and not see what we look like now, or how much we've changed.  Not much so you didn't miss out on much.

Being a Mom is the best reward ever!!!

Sometimes being a mom is the best reward you could ask for. Case in point...I have one very sick little boy, who is not so little anymore, and all he wants to do is cuddle with his mom to make him feel better. Next is the little 6 year old who is stalling her bedtime tonight, because she is so excited for the tooth fairy to come tonight. And all I want to do is tell her that she can stay up, but I can't or I will have a cranky 6 year old in the morning. I just can't do that to her very awesome 1st grade teacher.

 Being a mom isn't always the most glamorous...especially when you worked an entire 8 hours only to come home, get dinner on, and then get as much of the housework done that I can before it is my bedtime. But I wouldn't trade any of that. It makes me who I am and my kids make me even more of who I am.

How does one get it all done???

Today was a whirlwind of a day and I got absolutely nothing done.  There is the kid with the yucky cough who is having a hard day breathing.  The 8 hours I spent at work yet again.  Leave work to get the rent check.  Pick kids up from grandma.  Stop to get dinner because I have no time to make it.  A meeting at 6 pm that I just barely make it to on time.  Home again to get a little girl in the tub, dressed for bed and then up to bed.  Give medication to the sick one.  And I just can't do anymore.  The dishes will have to stay dirty tonight and the floor will not get swept till tomorrow.  I am finding it very hard to want to get any of this done, and I agreed to host a Shelf Reliance party for my sister on Thursday night.  I hope people don't mind that my house isn't 100% taken care of.

Hoping for my second wind tomorrow.  Maybe a good nights rest will take care of that for me.  Good night all, if you have some suggestions to help this mommy out, I am all ears.

Changes!!!

2013 is gracing our family with a lot of big changes. Most of the changes directly affect this mommy. It has been known for some time that my current place of employment was going to be losing our manager and his company that runs our office. There was a lot of unknowns that had to be taken care of...like who was going to sign a contract to run our office and if we were going to be retaining our jobs.

 Friday I was offered a full time position with the new company, doing what I already currently do. I stewed for an entire weekend trying to decide if this was the answer to our financial prayers. For the past 9 months Paul has been busy trying to find a new department to work for that would allow us some breathing room financially. Many months of prayers and fasting... and nothing had come our way until Friday. So to take some burden off of our financial issues to take care of a mountain of debt...we believe this is the answer to our prayers and fasting for the time being. I will be a full time mommy and a full time employee. It is not the best of circumstances, we know, but it is what we have to work with for the time being.

 I am sure there will be days that I lose it and want to cry. There will be things that I will have no choice, but to miss...I just hope that as my kids get a bit older they will understand why I had to go back to work full time. I love my kids, I love my husband and it breaks my heart that things weren't different.

So here's to a new year, a new beginning, and big changes for our future.

Another Day on the Job

A mom and dad's job is never done. Especially a working mom and dad. You have to love those phone calls from your husband that goes something like this...You're not going to believe what happened...my mom is taking the kids home early from swim practice...apparently Cameron hit his head on the wall at the pool and has an abrasion on his nose and it hurts really bad...he can't wear his glasses because it hurts his nose when he wears them.

I get home from work and find out the real story. Cameron was swimming, obviously, and lost his fin. Apparently his goggles filled up with water while he was trying to put the fin back on his foot, only to not see how close he was to the wall and sure enough, he finds the wall with his face. And tomorrow is picture day at school. Maybe the glasses will cover up the abrasion on his face and we will get a good picture out of him.

Welcome Fall

Fall has not quite made it to California yet. We spent the opening fall weekend at a family birthday party on Saturday. It was much warmer than what I am wanting fall to be. I have been commenting that we are going to be wearing shorts until Halloween if the weather doesn't get any cooler.

The kids had a blast, while at the birthday party, playing on their awesome tree house that their "Blue Grandpa" built for them. It is definitely the kind of tree house that just about every kid dreams about. It's not 100% complete, but it's getting there.

I have started up my Sunday Cookie Bake again. Forgot how much fun it is to get the kids involved with some baking. I also have a ton of new and easy recipes that any kid could make. Today was an old recipe I have made before. And there will be lots of cookies for the kids to take to school for the week. Yay, for yummy treats.

A Day Late and a Dollar Short

I had every intention of posting about my day and events...and didn't do it. Oh well, that's life and I can't stress over it. Have to just keep going.

This little munchkin earned a life skill award yesterday for responsibility. I have a responsible kid, only because her mom is responsible. I feel this is more of an award for her dad and I than her. She loves to procrastinate everything. And always finds better activities to fill her time, than what she is actually supposed to be doing. Her bedroom clean up has been going on now for 3 weeks. And I think the only toys that have been picked up are her Barbie's, and she didn't even put the box away. It's in the middle of her messy room. Thank goodness kids have parents for the first 18 years of their lives. This one is going to need us for awhile and thank goodness. Life would not be the same without her.

Rock Bottom Can Bring Out the Best

Sometimes it takes falling to rock bottom to realize it only brings out the best. It also makes you realize that all that really matters sometimes is the love of your family.

I had to have a little reminder of that today. The past few weeks have been difficult for me. Personal and money issues have made me a not so easy person to live with. Today I was reminded how much I am loved by those pictured above. No matter how crazy I get, no matter how ridiculous I get, no matter how hard I try to do it all without asking for help and fail, I am still loved by the most absolutely wonderful individuals. And every morning I get to start all over again, and watch them head out the door with smiles on their faces and a hug and a kiss good-bye to make rock bottom feel like the top of the world.

My goal for this week is to appreciate the love that is freely given to me and not squander it. I am truly blessed even with the trials that I currently have to face.

It's Just Another Post

Just another post from this girl. I have been lacking in my posting lately. I just haven't had the drive lately to want to take care of our family blog. Or take care of anything for that matter. You have missed the posts of the kids swim meets. The post about our family camping trip with our good friends, the Jackson's. No pictures of Paul's first triathlon. There are no updates of our trip to Monterey before the kids started school. No first day of school picture. It's not a depression thing. It's not a lazy thing, because I continually get on the computer and check the blog and just don't do anything about it. I am just tired and just trying to take it one day at a time. I wish that I could pinpoint what made me start slacking, just don't know. I've hit a bog and just can't get myself out of it. I do just enough to make me feel like I accomplished something during the day...and that usually is just a single load of laundry. I am hoping that just writing about my current state of mind and body, will get me out of my funk and get me more enthusiastic about getting up, starting my day, and working a little harder at the little things that add up to big things if not taken care of. Here's to hoping that just another post will work into a more productive and easier day for me tomorrow. Hopefully a post about better times tomorrow...and maybe I will find my camera if I am more productive.

Updates

I figured that while I am on hold for the advice nurse to tell me what to do for my sick little Madeline, I would update everyone on our adventures. There haven't been any. That's right we are boring, for now. The kids are busy with swim team practice. I am busy being mommy, employee, and swim team volunteer extrordinaire (don't know if I spelled that right, and spell checker doesn't know either). We had to get a new car, due to mine being totaled in a 6 car pile up on the freeway, and we didn't hit a single vehicle in the accident. Figure that one out. We are healing just fine, and thank goodness the kids didn't get hurt. This accident was a family affair. Scary moment, but we were all kept safe.

New Truck Got a truck instead of an exact replacement for my Pacifica, because Paul is going to start doing triathlons and we need the truck to haul all of his gear to his events. Makes hauling gear to all of the kids swim meets easier for me this year, because I will be without my better half for much of the season. Sacrifices. Blessings later. Had a fun time as a family at our local Stockton Thunder Hockey Game. The kids are finally getting to the age where they will actually sit and watch for a majority of the time, instead of needing to be up and running around. That makes me happy, because then I get to enjoy the game.

Our Cameron Man had to get glasses. He is the most adorable little guy with those things on. And he loves that he gets to wear glasses now. That poor kid had terrible vision. I think he loves them because he can actually see everything now. Now if he could only find his shoes in the morning before school. Easter came and went. The bunny visited and left some pretty cool toys and candy in the baskets and outside in the backyard. Almost as cool as Santa Claus.

The swim season has started. The weather is getting warmer. The family is doing well and are for the most part happy and healthy, which means I am a happy mom. Many more updates to follow as our kids grow up and we do many more fun things coming this summer.