WE MOVED!!! Ahhh

The Staley Family has set foot on another journey, back to the Ward and Stake that they came from.  After 5 years with our wonderful Ceres 2nd Ward family, we bought a house where we had come from.  It wasn't for a lack of trying to stay in Ceres.  Many days looking at homes to purchase, many offers on homes we thought would be accepted, and our Heavenly Father needed us back in Modesto.  We were sad to say goodbye to such great friends and acquaintances, but life is taking us onto new experiences and challenges.  And We Can't Wait.

Madeline has moved on to a new school just down the street from our new home.  On her second day at her new school she was asked to be one of the classroom representatives for the student council.  She has no problem fitting in and finding her way around.  She is our little go getter.

Cameron is still at his old school.  Change is far more difficult for him than for his sister.  Especially with the quarter still not finished and he is afraid of bad grades.  He will move on to his new junior high at the end of the quarter.  Barring any issues, he should do great at his new school.  A fresh start is what we (parents) think he needs.

Paul and I are hard at work trying to complete our unpacking duties, fix small little minor issues that need tending to in our new house, and work and take care of our little family all at the same time.  It is exhausting most days, but in the end well worth it.  We have a home that we can call our own.  We can make changes and memories to last a lifetime.  That is what makes this change all the easier to work with.

Life in General

Welcome to another post about our comings and goings.  The Staley Family just keeps trucking on. We take our hits, but nothing stops us.  We motor along and wait for the next hit.  What else is there to do.  We can't give up and we don't give up and we won't ever give up.

Madeline is still our little Marfan, but we have way more questions than answers at this time.  If you'd like to learn more please head to www.marfan.org.  They have so much info.  She is in the process of getting braces.  A process she is not looking forward to for the next couple of years.  She still is our little fish.  She amazes me in the water.  She just makes it look so effortless.  Who knows where it will take her.  I hope it takes her where she wants to go...where that is hasn't been decided yet. 

Cameron is probably going to be heading to an eye operation in the near future.  He has a pretty severe case of double vision that happens very often.  We were hoping to fix it with some prisms in his eyewear, but he has to make things difficult by seeing two on the horizontal and vertical plane.  That's the breaks.  He is very active with school, reading and golf.  He may not be very good...probably because his eyesight was much worse than originally thought, but he keeps on trucking.

Paul is busy with the Scouts and work and kids and being mister mom when he is off and I am working.  He is an amazing strength and support for me.  I could not do what I do without him.  Someday he will be recognized on more than just the home front.  

I am still the hard working mom who runs and runs and thinks I can do it all on my own without the help of others.  I am a work in progress.  My Young Women and my kids keep me going every direction, but I probably would not know what to do with myself if I was't going everywhere.  

Life is the way it is and I wouldn't have it any other way.  Because someday we won't have what we have today... and that is all that matters.

News From the Homefront

It has been quite awhile since I have posted.  Our little family has had some interesting life changes that has made us reflect more on our little family and how important it is that we are together as much as possible.

Our little Bama (Madeline), has gone in for routine cardiology appts. since she was 4 years old.  She was diagnosed with a mitral valve prolapse with regurgitation at that time.  On Nov. 17, 2014 she went in for her routine cardiology appt., but it wasn't routine.  They noticed a change in her aortic root and stem.  There was some growth.  Blood tests and genetics confirmed what the cardiologist thought she might have, Marfan Syndrome.  A genetic disorder that affects the connective tissue in the body.  The family is being tested as well.  We are awaiting test results to come back for the rest of us.  Our little active athlete now has a condition that does not allow her to play any contact sports or do any heavy lifting of any sort.  As it may put a strain on the area of her aorta that is already weakened by her disorder.

Yesterday we had a scare that no parent ever wants.  I got a call while I was a work saying Madeline was complaining of pressure and a sharp pain in her chest.  A call to the advice nurse and we were on our way to the ER for some tests to rule out any of the scary stuff that can happen with Marfan Syndrome (aortic dissection or pneumothorax).  All test came back normal so they think that it may by musculoskeletal pain due to her Marfan disorder.  The muscles that run along the chest wall could have loosened causing discomfort because of shifting.  It's all kind of crazy, but we take it in stride, keep her medical history in a binder for future appt., and continue on with a little piece in the back of our mind to watch our little Bama very closely.

Some Thought and Reflection

I took some time off to take care of me.  I get into funks now and then because I compare myself to others.  Mainly those who have the unique opportunity to stay home with their children.  Something I have wanted and feel that I need.  I came to the conclusion that maybe I need this struggle to better prepare myself, my family and my spirit for what may come in the future.  I don't know what the future holds, but after listening to Pres. Uctdorfs (LDS General Authority and Counselor in the Presidency) I realize I need to close my umbrella and accept blessings as they fall from heaven.

Got to spend a great day yesterday with a great bunch of youth at the temple and now I feel ready to take on the world.

ACCEPT what cannot be changed

Life in the Staley Family has not changed.   I still work out of the home and am doing my best to better accept what I cannot change.  My Heavenly Father has a reason for me to be doing what I am doing.  I have to accept that.  Plain and simple.

I have, though, had some changes that I never did see coming...or maybe a little.  I was called nearly 6 months ago to become our Young Womens president for our ward.  I had every intention of saying no. With my busy work schedule and mom schedule there was just no way it was going to work out, but something wouldn't let me say no.  I had to say yes.  I am not perfect and have made some mistakes, but I have learned a great deal from the wonderful girls.  They make me a better person and help me accept what I cannot change.

Paul has been called as the First Counselor and Scoutmaster for our ward's Young Mens group.  This makes life even busier for our family of four.  But I have seen a change in him that makes my heart melt.   For so many years, because of his occupation and different schedules, he hadn't been able to hold a calling that, in my opinion, made him feel that he was really doing anything.  Now he carries himself in different way, in a good way, in a better way.

Cameron turned 11 and joined the ranks of the Boy Scouts.  No more Cub Scouts for my boy.  Now he gets to spend his time with his dad at Scouts.  He loves it.

Madeline has hit growth spurt after growth spurt.  She is nearly as tall as her brother and doesn't seem to be stopping anytime soon.  She can hardly wait for her 8th birthday and everything that comes with being 8.

We have been busy with the kids swim season and both kids qualified for the Meet of Champions in Woodland, CA.  I couldn't be more happy of their success.  I have fish for children.  Can't wait to see what happens in 2 weeks.  I hope, that no matter where they finish,

that they are happy with their results, whether they come in first of dead last.








A picture of my little fish at the beach in Santa Cruz.  Madeline loved the ocean and being in it, Cameron loves it from the safety of the beach.

Lemons & Lemonade

Just when I thought that life had handed me all the lemons to make lemonade, a few more were thrown my way just to add to the fun.  We all know the saying "when life hands you lemons, make lemonade", but I have way to many lemons and not enough pitchers to hold the lemonade that is needing to be made.

Today my kids and I had a cry fest.  A cry fest that is one for the ages.  I miss being at home with my kids.  They miss me being home.  I feel guilty because I have to work so much away from home and they feel bad because I have to work outside the home.  It is a catch 22 lately.  When we think we are headed in a direction that will give me a chance to be the "stay at home mom" it all comes crashing back to reality that it can't happen yet.  And I suffer in silence until I break and my kids break, because they know how much I miss being the mom that I feel had to take a back seat to help our situation and give our kids opportunities to grow and develop into the individuals that they want to be someday.

Sacrificing is so hard and so is making lemonade.  Especially when the lemons keep coming.  And so there will be lots of lemonade on hand if anyone is looking for some.  I have a lot.

Again and again and again

It has been a few weeks since I last wrote.  I had been avoiding the blog, because it would be the same old story.

I have worked outside the home from the beginning of our marriage.  Kids were born, and I continued to work.  Our kids have come to an age where I wish I was home.  And every week I am wishing that this particular dream/blessing would come to light and come true.  And every week I sink a little lower when it doesn't happen.

I love what I do, but it has changed since last year.  I find myself just trying to make it through the day without letting on how miserable I am.  My problem, I bring my misery home because I have no outlet at work.  I am consistently helping everyone, but myself.  I help the PT in the office, I help the patients in office, I help the receptionist in the office, I come home and I help the kids as best I can.  Yet, I always bring a poor attitude home and it affects me, and I know it affects my children.  I try so hard and yet I feel like they keep their distance because they are afraid of tipping the scale to far and getting an earful from their me.

I can't keep up at home.  My life is being affected in ways that I didn't want to happen.  I just want for someone to see beyond my fake smile and know that I am not okay, because I won't tell anyone, because I have to stay strong.  I have to maintain that everything on the inside is the same as the outside.

I feel lost and am trying to find my way.  Someday soon it has to all change for the better.